Look For When It's Not There
So many instructions invite us to witness thoughts, emotions, sensations as they are happening.
If you have a thought, emotion or sensation that is plaguing you, and you have been "being" with it, watching it, observing it, allowing it, blah blah blah, and it's "still" happening, try noticing when it's not happening.
If you are experiencing grief, for example, rather than making it the focus, let it fall to the background, and make the intention to notice when it is not present. Give the mind some other aspects to notice - lean into breath more, or grounding, or seeing. When grief is strong, still acknowledge it and hold it gently, and allow it to reveal its nature. But, ALSO, make the intention to notice a moment in the day when it is not there.
Notice the absence of things. It was too hot, and now it's not. I was so tired, and now I'm not. I have been so afraid, but it's not that strong right now. I wanted to be alone, now I want to hang with people. I am usually pessimistic, but I'm not right now. My back was hurting, but right now it's not.
Just noticing the absence will unconsciously teach your system that things are always changing. When your being understands that things are always changing, it automatically clings less. Resists less. Judges less. Needs less. Is disappointed less.
Just choose one or two things that feel very common, strong, or relentless in you and make the intention right now to notice when it is not there or not that strong.